They Want to Make You Do WHAT?!

By: Greg | August 15th, 2007

div The operative answer to the question posed in the headline is: work. For some reason, yesterday, the powers that be at my job actually expected me to “earn” my paycheck and I was out on the road selling all day. I did real well and had a celebratory sing-a-long to the Divinyls’ “I Touch Myself.” If you wish to question my manhood, feel free to do so. I say it makes me more of a man that I can admit such a stripped-down outburst of joy took place between me, my Jeep Grand Cherokee, and my radio. Either way, you have my excuse and now my apology for not checking in with my seven faithful readers yesterday. So let’s cut the crap and get down to the various goings-on…

**Dady Left Mommy Because You’re a Bad Boy – In a freakish twist of fate and complete 180 of expectation, Belenenses hitman (yes, this superlative works here because the guy finished second in scoring last year) Dady, has bidded The Blues from Restelo adieu. He’s headed for fourteenth place in the Spanish Liga by putting his chips in with Osasuna. A commenter called simply “red” seemed to intimate on my last reporting of this transfer that Dady was smart to move to a team which will not figure in European competition and is in the bottom half of the Liga because Belenenses are the equivalent of the third tier in Spain. Since I only have a handful of readers, I’ll refrain from berating you magnificent seven and simply say that I disagree completely. I’d rather be on a good team in a mid-level league than a downright crappy one in a good league, especially when it means I get to play in UEFA-level cup competitions.

**Rui Costa Saves The Day — Benfica defeated FC Copenhagen yesterday 2-1 in the first leg of the third round of Champions League qualifiers at the Stadium of Luminosity and Radiance. In truth, Benfica played rather poorly and were lucky escape with the win. Rui Costa played out of his mind and had two nice finishes. The away goal still looms large here and even though they won the first leg, Benfica are not out of the woods by any stretch of imagination. Check the well edited video at the bottom for highlights which contain a semi-NSFW bra shot in them. You don’t wanna miss the body on this young lady!

**Uncle Manny to Everton — I’ve found that almost every Portuguese person I know has an “Uncle Manny,” therefore, I figured that Manuel Fernandes has to be SOMEONE’S “Uncle Manny.” Benfica accepted Everton’s offer to buy out the rest of Fernandes’ sporting rights and since he didn’t figure in last night’s Champions League qualifier, he’s eligible for the lower-tier UEFA Cup that Everton have qualified for by placing 6th in last year’s Premier League table. Everton have looked excellent in their first two Premier League games and are temporarily top of the table with wins of 2-1 over Wigan and 3-1 over perennial underachievers Tottenham. Fernandes had a great season last year with The Toffees and should figure a great deal in David Moyes’ plans this year. Fernandes’ heart never really seemed to be in staying with the Eagles, thus the move to sell their remaining stake in the Portuguese midfielder made sense.

**Scolari announces convoked ones for the Armenia Euro 2008 qualifier — Nearly every game from here on out is a crucial one. The following Chops selected better put together a win against Armenia, or else I’ll cry.

Keep-nets: Ricardo and Quim

Laterals: Ricky Carvalho, Bosingwa, Mike, Fernando Meira, Jorge Andrade, Paulie Ferrara (why did that ESPN guy keep calling Ferreira “Ferrara” during the Beckham gala? It drove me NUTS.), and Caneira.

The Best Group of Midfielders in the World: Tiago, Lil’ João Moutinho, Mike Veloso, Art Deco, See-Mow, Crissy Ronaldo, The Mustang, and Raul Meireles.

Ted Strikers: João Tomas, No-No Gomes, and Helder Postiga.

I have a 2:30 sales meeting which means I have 22 minutes to get to a place which is 30 minutes away. I was done with my musings for the day anyways, and my dedication to this blog can not be questioned, especially given the fact that I’m willing to be late to a meeting for a potential $50,000 contract sale in order to let you seven people know just what’s on my mind when it comes to the world of Portuguese football. Força Portugal!